So the last few days have been a rough few for me. For some reason I have felt very lonely and sad for myself. My best friend Holly had her baby. He is adorable and I am so happy for her. But then another friend had her baby.. a sis-in-law is due any day.. and another friend found out what they are having.. and it continues and continues.. I want my baby. I want to be having all the experiences of being pregnant with all my friends. I want to be finding out what Im having in the next couple weeks like i shouldve been. I want that amazing connection you and your spouse get with feeling the baby kick and going to dr appointments and all the other fun things that happen. I have been edgy and grumpy lately and I feel I have taken most of it out on my husband which is the last person who deserves it. Tommy is amazing. He is an amazing person and an even more amazing husband. He brings me home roses almost every week.. he cleans the house.. he does the laundry.. he tells me more in one day how special I am and how much he loves me then some wives hear in a week. I love him so much and can't even remember what my life was like before he was in it. And i dont want to! I feel like in some ways this couldve been a secret blessing becuase I have come to appreciate my husband much more and absolutely LOVE the time I get to spend with just him!! We have so much fun even when were just sitting at home cooking dinner together or watching a movie together or taking our dogs on a walk :) We have a beautiful house, 2 running vehicles, jobs, 2 special pups, wonderful families that are all mostly close.. I have been blessed in so many ways and .sometimes need to sit back and look at them all when im feeling sorry for myself. Thank you for everyone making our trials lately much easier.. our families are amazing

Just a quick post in case everyone hasn't heard, Tommy and I lost the baby. I went in for a d&c yesterday. Thank you everyone for your love, support, and prayers. We love and appreciate all of you.

Maui 09'

This summer we had the amazing opportunity to go to Maui! We went with our good friends (tommys cousin and wife!) Chase and Nicole. We stayed in a beautiful hotel and had so much fun!! We did lots of site seeing, ocean swimming, shopping, EATING (way more then needed!! and Snorkeling! That was by far my favorite part! (well that and bubba gumps! :) ) we went on a boat out to molokini which is a 1/2 sunken crater and they let you snorkel with the most amazing looking fish, then they feed you and take you to a place they call turtle town where we got to swim and snorkel with sea turtles!!! it was AWESOME!!! We had so much fun and I cant wait to go back. here are some random pics of the adventure! pics are in no order!

the cool aquarium
falls at the hana

my goofball tommy!

gorgeous view at a stop off on hana

on the road to hana

on the snorkeling boat

getting ready to snorkel!

our waitor and us the 2nd night i believe :)

one of the 2 nights we went there in a row! heck yeah we did!!

our homemade hot tub! :) (the one for the hotel was always packed!)

shopping at lahaina

yum!

the bedroom

living room cute little kitchen

our amazing bathroom

my cute hubby making fresh fruit smoothies!

my hearty breakfast that included mt dew (duh!) golden grahams, toast with peanut butter, banana bread, and pineapple :)

the cutest and YUMMIEST shaved ice stand we found

SEVEN....Seriously?!

So remember my last post about puppies and having a week or 2..yeah well i lied. THEY'RE HERE!!! All 7 of the little monsters! -she had 8 but one didn't make it :( - They are cute as can be! Well, kinda :) they are in the newborn rodent looking phase but are so tiny cant help but to be cute! They will be adorable in a week or 2 when their eyes are open and they grow into their heads and are more mobile :) but i promised pictures so here you are!

look at them all sleep in a row :)

tired mama and her pups!

look how small they are :) isn't he cute?!

puppies anyone?!

Thats right, things are busy here at the Merrill house! Babies, and now puppies!! Our boxers are having puppies :) My babies are having babies.. now I feel like mom! ha :) Shes huge and about to pop! Were thinking she will have them in a week or 2! So if anyone is interested (brian!)... :) Ill post pictures when the little monsters are here!

mama
mama being huge!

papa :)

1 + 1 = 3 ... :)

Well, we havent posted since June...we've been a little busy :) you know, work, other work, church callings... (get your mind outta the gutter!!) but... we do have a small addition to our family! and by small I mean like 5 weeks along :) yep, WE ARE HAVING A BABY! according to our math it is not a maui baby (which I still need to post pictures of!) but it is a baby indeed! I know we are announcing a little early but we are just too excited to keep it a secret! (plus we already told mom so I figured I needed to make a post before she got her megafone out!) I don't go to the doctor till mid November so we will update everyone on the status then!

Happy birthday Steph and Bri

My twin siblings Steph and Brian's birthday was on June 2nd! (they are 29!!!!) ha! although if you ask Bri he might tell you 30 cuz he can't remember with his old age! dorkus :) I love you guys and hope you had a wonderful birthday!
typical Brian face!
and typical steph face :) he he